When Dates Go Bad - Top 5 Best Exit Strategies

Meeting more people in a smaller amount of time means that you’re going to have to get good at bailing when the date starts to go sour. Here’s some tips from onenightfriendfree to help you skedaddle so you can rush home and respond to the plethora of other hotties waiting to hook up.

  1. Fake pulling a muscle. Give yourself a self massage for a few minutes then politely apologize for the (seemingly) excruciating pain you’re going through and limp feebly toward the exit. Remember, the more twisted your facial expression is the more uncomfortable your date will feel, making them wish you’d left a little bit sooner.
  2. Fake like you’re getting a call from your neighbor about your dog being sick. “Fido WHAT????…. oh no….. really?? … OMG… well, yes I….. Okay…. diarrhea??….” Take a mental snapshot of your date as you say the word “diarrhea” really loud and drawn out. Then, make a scene and rush out muttering something about how you’d never forgive yourself is something happened to the only best friend you’ve ever had in the world. If you play your cards right you can “accidentally” forget to pay as well, saving yourself a few bucks. I’d save this for someone who is already being a complete jerk, otherwise you’re just being kinda mean.
  3. Fake being sick. If you’re good at role playing this can come off as totally legit, and will leave your date feeling sorry for you. They may even pay for your cab ride home. A little manipulative, at least this technique won’t hurt their feelings. This is a good option if you want to try to keep them as a friend!
  4. Have a friend call you, faking an emergency. The bad thing about this option is that it is SO overplayed. Your date is likely to know that you’re taking the easy way out, and what’s the point of that if you’re trying to keep them from knowing that you’re bailing? You might as well just say “I’m not into you” and walk out.
  5. Flat out say “I’m not into you, at all,” and saunter out. There’s nothing like confidence to make you feel sexy and alive. Maybe you can pick up a member of the wait staff as you exit, just don’t let the door hit you on the way out.

Wenis (or Weinus) - Funny Friday Word of the Day

People talk with words. You know, language. People use onenightfriendfree to share words with each other. This is also known as “chatting”.

Therefore, Funny Friday is dedicated to all of the funny words that people use while chatting over video.

Today’s word of the week is “wenis” or, alternatively, “weinus”.

Wenis

Refers to the skin of your elbow. This word is awesome. It sounds sexual, but is not. It sounds gross, but is in fact a very interesting part of the body that does not react to pain when pinched. Try it. Pinch your wenis, you cannot feel a thing!

Weinus

Refers to a small male penis. A derogatory term that should never be used within earshot of the person you are referring to.

[Obviously we are not going to show a picture of this one. That would be porn. You can go to Chatroulette to find that lol].

Sex education with Jesus

Jesus resurrected on Easter, again. Watch Jesus tell kids what’s up with the birds and the bees on ShufflePeople.com.

The actual life of Jesus Christ may have been a little tamer than what is depicted in this video, but he makes a good point:  what does the Easter Bunny have to do with Easter anyway?

According to folk lore the rabbit is a symbol of female fertility while eggs are a symbol of rebirth, both symbols from the Holy Roman Empire in the early 1600s.

Sarah Palin for Playboy Bunny, Then President, Who’s With Us?

Sarah Palin continues to make headlines and no one is even sure if she’s actually going to make an attempt to run for office again.

After her last stint with John McCain it’s unlikely anyone will pick her as their running partner, but she draws such an audience that she continues to make appearances and draw attentive crowds wherever she goes. Her good looks and charming personality give her MILF status that rocks the masculine world. I wonder if Playboy has hit her up to be on their cover yet? Imagine having a playboy bunny as president. Really can’t think of anything more appropriate for America in 2012. Palin for playboy bunny, then president in 2010, who’s with us?

Here’s a clip of Palin’s appearance on the Tonight Show with Jay Leno last night. Maybe we’ll see her reaching out to the public on onenightfriendfree video chat if she does decide to run for office in 2012, she’s obviously got a knack for being in front of the camera.

Toyota: Still In Trouble, After 9 Years!


According to the New York Times Toyota’s Prius acceleration FAIL began nine years ago! WTF! And possibly led to 34 deaths in that time period, which is sad.

Toyota has posted loads of video and social media propaganda, literally strewn across a plethora of social networks, all but onenightfriendfree. What gives? Maybe they’re afraid. I mean, they wouldn’t have any down time to compose the “right” answer which, as we pointed out earlier in this post, they still don’t seem to have a clue about anyway.

Seriously though, Toyota is great. They still have our support. Just because they have some intermittent deadly acceleration problems doesn’t make them bad in our book, they still last a lot longer than a Ford!

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